Ayn Rand Dead in Gloucester Snowstorm

Because we think this story from the Gloucester Clam, an upstanding online journal of Yankee musings, a necessary public service to libertarians up here in New Hampshire, we decided to re-post this. We’re sure that Manchester will cease to function as throngs of young philosophers of libertarianism put down their bongs and take a break from their bit-coin trading to have a moment of silence in remembrance of this fine woman.  This woman who unleashed a culture of gibberish to give delusional narcissists everywhere the freedom to mooch with impunity .

We wish also to not forget those warriors of the free market hunkered down in their beat-up motorhomes bunkers or living comfortably on an inheritance purchased hard earned sixty acre farm, where they fight against Monsanto and for corporate-capitalist  freedom.  We’re sure they will grab their carbines and weep bitter tears.  You are all now on your own dear warriors.  But Ayn wouldn’t have wanted it any other way, even when she was alive.
[h/t Susan Bruce]

Ayn Rand Dead in Gloucester Snowstorm

Rand, smoking110 year old philosopher and novelist Ayn Rand perished in a snowstorm that covered much of the Northeast this week. Thought to have died in 1982, it was revealed she simply faked her own death to avoid paying debts on the successful treatment of her lung cancer which ran into the hundreds of thousands of dollars, her being philisopically opposed to Medicare.

Having escaped to East Gloucester to live under an assumed name, she was known for loudly rejecting help from neighbors. “Do not condescend to me with charity,” she shouted at Bob D’Palazola who just recently tried to remove snow from her driveway with his snowblower as he had for many elderly neighbors on the street.

“I thought she was nuts,” said the plumber and good Samaritan, “Considering how much she smokes there is no way she should be out there shoveling herself. I tried to get her reconsider but she started yelling about how indebtedness corrupting the fiber of the soul of man and I’m like screw it, Ill just go do my brother-in-laws house.”

For more of the story: Ayn Rand Dead in Gloucester Snowstorm

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One thought on “Ayn Rand Dead in Gloucester Snowstorm

  1. KT Toomey says:

    thanks for the link, y’all rule!

    -kt, half of the gloucester clam

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